As I watch my son Adrián navigate daily conversations, I’m often transported back to my own childhood. The confused expressions, the moments of pause when someone says something that doesn’t quite make sense, the way he process language so carefully and thoroughly it all feels so familiar because I lived it too.
Being an autistic adult raising autistic children has given me a unique window into one of the most misunderstood aspects of autism: literal thinking. And let me tell you, it’s both beautiful and challenging in ways that neurotypical people might not fully grasp.
What Is Literal Thinking?
Literal thinking means taking words, phrases, and expressions at their exact face value. When someone tells my son to “break a leg” before his school presentation, he genuinely worries about injury. When I was his age and heard “it’s raining cats and dogs,” I remember looking up at the sky, genuinely puzzled about where all these animals were supposed to be falling from.
This isn’t about being unable to learn, it’s about how our autistic brains process language differently. We hear precision where others hear flexibility. We seek clarity where others assume understanding.
My Own Journey with Literal Thinking
I remember being eight years old and my teacher saying, ” you have your head in the clouds” or “I need you to keep your eyes peeled.” I spent the entire day worried about what would happen to my eyes and why anyone would want to peel them. The anxiety was real, the confusion overwhelming, and the embarrassment when I finally asked what she meant was something that stayed with me for years.
As an adult, I’ve learned to navigate figurative language, but it took time, patience, and a lot of gentle correction. The beautiful thing is that my literal thinking hasn’t disappeared, it’s evolved. It helps me be precise in my communication, thorough in my work, and incredibly detail-oriented in everything I do.
Watching My Children Navigate This World
When I see Adrián pause after someone uses an idiom, or asks for clarification on something that seems “obvious” to others, my heart both breaks and swells. It breaks because I remember that confusion, that feeling of being on the outside of some secret code everyone else seemed to know. But it swells because I see their minds working, processing, trying to understand, and that’s actually incredible.
These moments take me right back to my own childhood:
- The time someone said “hold your horses” and I looked around for horses
- When my mom said dinner would be “in a jiffy” and I asked how long exactly a jiffy was
- The confusion when someone said they were “pulling my leg” when their hands were nowhere near my legs
The Beauty in Literal Thinking
Here’s what many people don’t realize: literal thinking isn’t a deficit, it’s a different way of processing the world that comes with its own strengths. My children (and I) tend to be:
- Incredibly honest and direct in communication
- Precise and accurate when giving or following instructions
- Detail-oriented in ways that catch things others miss
- Consistent in how we interpret and respond to information
How We Can Support Our Literal Thinkers
As parents, educators, and community members, we can help our autistic children (and adults) by:
Being patient with questions. When a child asks what seems like an obvious question, they’re not being difficult, they’re seeking genuine understanding.
Explaining idioms and figurative language. Don’t assume they’ll “pick it up.” Take time to explain what expressions actually mean.
Appreciating their precision. When they correct seemingly small details, they’re showing you how their minds work, and often they’re right about those details!
Modeling clear communication. Say what you mean as directly as possible. It helps everyone understand better.
A Resource for Families
This journey of understanding literal thinking in autism, both from my own childhood memories and watching my children, inspired me to write “Autism: My Invisible Backpack.” This book is specifically designed for autistic children ages 6-14, helping them understand their own minds and giving parents insights into how their children process the world.
In the book, we explore not just literal thinking, but all the unique ways autistic minds work. It’s written from the perspective of understanding and learning more about these differences, not trying to change them. Because the goal isn’t to make our children think like neurotypical people, it’s to help them understand themselves and help others understand them.
Moving Forward with Understanding
Every time I watch Adrián or Guillermo work through a confusing expression or ask for clarification on something, I’m reminded that their brains are doing exactly what they’re supposed to do. They’re processing, analyzing, and trying to understand with incredible thoroughness.
As a community, when we understand and appreciate literal thinking, we create space for autistic individuals to thrive exactly as they are. We stop seeing their need for clarity as a problem to fix and start seeing it as a different, and often more precise, way of engaging with the world.
My invisible backpack is lighter these days, filled with understanding instead of confusion, with acceptance instead of shame. And I’m working every day to ensure that my children’s backpacks are lighter than mine ever was.
If you’re parenting an autistic child or supporting autistic individuals in your life, “Autism: My Invisible Backpack” offers insights, understanding, and practical guidance for ages 6-12. Get your copy here and join us in celebrating the beautiful, unique ways autistic minds work.